What do actors do during kissing scenes?
The truth behind on-screen romance: technique, awkwardness, and professionalism
(By Carmichael Phillip)
Understanding the Illusion: Acting vs. Reality
Kissing scenes in film and television are rarely as romantic as they appear to the audience. For actors, these moments are crafted with technical precision, professionalism, and often a great deal of awkwardness. The director, cinematographer, and intimacy coordinator work together to choreograph the kiss down to the smallest detail—sometimes even dictating when an actor should breathe or tilt their head.
Contrary to popular belief, there is very little spontaneity in most kissing scenes. The goal is not genuine affection but creating a believable emotional beat in the story. Actors must convey chemistry on-screen, even when they may not share any off-screen attraction.
What Are Intimacy Coordinators?
In recent years, the presence of intimacy coordinators has become standard in Hollywood. Their job is to ensure that scenes involving physical intimacy, including kissing, are handled safely, consensually, and with full transparency. They help actors communicate their boundaries, design choreography, and rehearse scenes in a way that minimizes discomfort and prioritizes respect.
For instance, in HBO’s Euphoria, Zendaya has spoken about the importance of having an intimacy coordinator on set, especially in scenes that involved her co-stars in vulnerable positions. This professional ensures that actors can express concerns and retain autonomy while fulfilling their role.
Preparation and Choreography: Nothing Is Left to Chance
Kissing scenes are typically blocked like fight scenes. Every movement is planned—from hand placement to the angle of the kiss to how long it should last. The director might call for multiple takes from different angles, and sometimes, the actors are coached on how to perform a kiss that looks passionate on camera while maintaining professionalism.
Take Keira Knightley and Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest. Their kiss was unexpected—even Knightley reportedly asked director Gore Verbinski for another take just for fun. Despite the surprise element, it was rehearsed, directed, and crafted to look compelling.
Techniques to Reduce Awkwardness
Actors use a range of tricks to reduce the awkwardness of kissing on set. For example, they might eat mints beforehand, avoid strong-smelling foods, and discuss boundaries in advance. In some cases, they use a “closed mouth” technique, where the kiss is performed without the tongue, and camera angles help sell the illusion.
Jennifer Lawrence famously joked about her pre-kiss habits on The Hunger Games set, saying she’d deliberately eat garlic or tuna before kissing Liam Hemsworth as a prank. While humorous, this also highlights how actors find ways to make these moments feel more bearable and less emotionally intense.
Creating On-Screen Chemistry Without Real Romance
Actors often have to create believable romantic chemistry even if there’s no personal spark. This is part of the job. Directors may run chemistry tests before filming to see how actors interact, especially in romance-heavy productions.
In The Notebook, Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams famously did not get along during early filming, yet their kissing scenes remain some of the most iconic in romantic film history. This is a testament to their acting ability and the technical precision of the filmmakers.
Dealing with Nerves and Emotions
It’s not uncommon for actors to feel nervous or vulnerable during intimate scenes. Even seasoned professionals admit to anxiety. Emotional preparation and trust between co-stars are essential.
Emma Watson once revealed she was extremely nervous about kissing Rupert Grint in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Since the two grew up together, the scene felt more like kissing a brother. They worked closely with the director and relied on humor to get through it.
What Happens After “Cut” Is Called?
Once the scene is finished, actors usually break the tension with laughter or light conversation. The energy on set can become very businesslike, with the crew quickly adjusting lighting or setting up for the next shot.
Actors like Andrew Garfield have talked about how clinical these moments can feel, especially with dozens of crew members watching, cameras rolling, and a boom mic hovering overhead. The magic seen on screen is a carefully curated product of editing, lighting, music, and multiple takes—not a real emotional connection.
Examples of Iconic Kissing Scenes and What Really Happened
Some of Hollywood’s most famous kisses come with behind-the-scenes stories that deflate the fantasy.
Spider-Man (2002): The upside-down kiss between Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst became iconic, but Maguire later said it was a miserable experience. Rain was pouring into his nostrils, and he could barely breathe during the scene.
Titanic (1997): Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet’s kiss on the bow of the ship is one of the most memorable in cinema. Winslet revealed they had to do many takes and that she worried about looking bloated or windblown because of the sea breeze.
La La Land (2016): Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling have a well-known chemistry. Their kiss scenes were rehearsed extensively and carefully timed with lighting and music cues to preserve the film’s whimsical aesthetic.
These scenes are remembered for their beauty and intensity, but their creation was anything but glamorous.
Cultural Differences and Changing Industry Norms
What’s acceptable or expected in kissing scenes varies by country and culture. In Bollywood, for decades, on-screen kisses were taboo. Even today, some Indian films avoid direct lip contact and imply intimacy through music, body language, or camera angles.
Meanwhile, in Western cinema, expectations have shifted toward more realistic portrayals of relationships—including LGBTQ+ intimacy. The industry now focuses more on consent, comfort, and authenticity than ever before.
Actors such as Simu Liu (Shang-Chi) and Florence Pugh (Don’t Worry Darling) have praised modern sets for fostering environments that prioritize safety and consent over traditional “get the shot at all costs” attitudes.
When Kisses Aren’t Real: Tricks of the Trade
Sometimes, actors don’t kiss at all. Clever camera angles, lighting, and editing can create the illusion of a kiss when none actually occurred. Body doubles are also used in certain cases.
For example, in Body Heat (1981), actress Kathleen Turner reportedly used a body double for more explicit scenes, although she did perform her own kisses. In modern television, especially on networks with content restrictions, these methods allow filmmakers to suggest romance without crossing boundaries.
Even in Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, the kiss between Rey and Kylo Ren was not rehearsed in advance, and its spontaneity was more about storytelling than true romance.
Conclusion: The Kiss Is Just Another Scene
For actors, a kissing scene is a job—a moment in the script that needs to be delivered with professionalism and precision. It may look spontaneous and passionate on screen, but behind every on-screen kiss is a well-oiled machine of planning, respect, and technical artistry.
What the audience sees is romance. What the actor experiences is choreography. It’s an essential reminder that in cinema, even love is constructed.
From iconic kisses to awkward rehearsals, the world of on-screen romance remains one of the most fascinating parts of filmmaking—where magic and method meet in front of the camera.